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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23170225">To Be Human</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluewind77/pseuds/Bluewind77'>Bluewind77</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The 100 (TV), clexa fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, Cute Lexa (The 100), F/F, Innocent!Lexa, Minor Character Death, One-Shot, Time Skips, just a litte of angst</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 13:55:16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,735</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23170225</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluewind77/pseuds/Bluewind77</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A story where Lexa was created in a lab from Becca's perfected DNA,</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Clarke Griffin &amp; Lexa, Clarke Griffin/Lexa</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>144</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>To Be Human</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is a hard time for all of us with COVID-19 spreading, i hope all of you is safe out there,</p><p>i wrote this one shot to take my mind off things so i can proceed with my other 3 fics. i'm sorry for not updating lately, real life sucks sometimes.</p><p>anyway! i hope you like this one, guys. I beta this by myself, so i'll apologize in advance for errors you might find.<br/>enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p> </p><p>“Doctor, I’m sorry to interrupt. Subject 02 is ready,” a tall man rushed in to her office, tablet in his hand.</p><p>“Vitals?” the brunette woman with black rimmed glasses stood from her chair and walked around her desk.</p><p>“All clear, Ma’am,” the man said</p><p>“Good, let’s wake my baby up,” she walked confidently towards the elevator that descended directly to the underground laboratory.</p><p>The man read every detail he’s got regarding the subject they were working while the elevator brought them lower and when the door opened, they walked directly to where the subject was.</p><p>“We’ve been waiting for this. Wake her up,” the doctor instructed her employees; the best team she’s ever had,</p><p>They held their breaths while the liquid from a cylindrical chamber being drained. Two women in lab coat opened the giant glass tube, there lied a girl. Her tan skin was pale, brown hair still wet from the chemical liquid, wires all over her body and an oxygen mask on.</p><p>The two doctors lifted her to the table in the middle of the room, and covered the girl with a thin blanket.</p><p>“Start the procedure,” the brunette woman said and the rest of her team scrambled towards the girl.</p><p>“I’m proud of you, Becca,” a woman with light brown hair stood beside her</p><p>“It wasn’t just me, Abby. We worked so hard to this point. This is going to be a breakthrough in medical field,” Becca smiled as she saw her team injected Epinephrine to wake the girl.</p><p>Becca stood on the right side of the girl, Abby was right next to her as they watched as the heart rate picked up and walked closer when the girl’s fingers twitched and waited in anticipation for the girl to open her eyes.</p><p>At that moment, Becca felt a weird feeling washed over her when the deep green eyes stared blankly at her.</p><p> </p><p>//</p><p> </p><p>“Where did I go wrong?” Becca massaged her temple and slumped down on the couch in her office, Abby followed her, just as disappointed as she was.</p><p>“She woke up a month ago, Becca. She is still a baby, literally.” Abby said</p><p>“But she wasn’t a baby, Abby. We designed her to be perfect, to be able to learn faster than her predecessor,”</p><p>“She is perfect, Becca. With her DNA that came from you, I’m sure she would inherit your genius gene. You worked hard to eliminate the flaws humans have. She would be stronger, smarter, than normal humans. But brain was a very tricky matter. Maybe we need different approach with her,” Abby patted her friend on the shoulder,</p><p>“Maybe stop calling her Subject 02. We’re creating human, not a robot,” Abby suggested,</p><p>“You’re right, I’ll think of a name for her. I need you to do a thorough medical check-up on her,” Becca stood up and Abby followed,</p><p>“Okay, I’ll do it right away. I need to be home in two hours,” Abby said as they walked toward the lab where Subject 02 was,</p><p>“Oh, how were Jake and Clarke by the way?” Becca asked and her friend’s face brightened,</p><p>“They’re good. Jake took a day off and Clarke should be home by now,” they stopped at the glass door and saw people scattered around doing their job, the girl was inside a separate room in the corner with transparent glass walls around so they could monitor her without overwhelming the girl.</p><p>“Did they know what you’re working on?” Becca asked</p><p>“No. I don’t want to risk it. You told me this was confidential, and if anything happened to me, to us, I don’t want them to get involved,” Abby turned to face Becca,</p><p>“Nothing will happen to us, Abby. No one knows about this project besides the team and our funder,” Becca reassured the other woman,</p><p>“Can we trust them?”</p><p>“You don’t have to trust them, Abby. Just trust me,” the brunette said and Abby nodded,</p><p>“Alright, then. I’ll go check up on her,” Abby walked towards the transparent room, whereas Becca went to check the files from their previous subjects.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>She watched people wrapped in white fabric, she learned that it called lab coat. She learned a few the basic things two weeks ago, but still hadn’t improved. Well, that’s what those people said every time they would visit her.</p><p>They would put something to her flesh, which later she learned was called needle. It stung, and there was a tube that would be filled with red thing. They told her it was blood, and they needed it so that they could learn more about her.</p><p>Those people in lab coat called her Subject 02. She didn’t know what it meant, but she didn’t want them to call her that.</p><p>There would be two women that always came to her room every day. Later, she learned that the dark haired one was Becca, and the brown haired one was Abby. They always asked questions about what she has learned a day before. They wanted her to ‘talk’ to them, but she was confused. She didn’t know how, and she was bored. They would repeat what they taught her a day before, but she wanted to know more. It wasn’t enough, the basics, as they said, wasn’t enough. She would grunt and pushed them, telling them she was tired listening to the same thing every day. But they didn’t understand.</p><p>She couldn’t hear much from her room, but every time Abby came in, she would talk to her. She learned some new words, and weirdly, she would know what it means.</p><p>“Hello there,” Abby would greet her every time she walked in.</p><p>She didn’t know what to make of it, and Abby would type something on a square thin object that was called a tablet, and sighed in disappointment.</p><p>But today she wanted to try and cheer her up, so she opened her mouth slowly,</p><p>“Hello there,” she felt weird. Her voice sounded different than when she grunted, and she jumped a little. She tilted her head when Abby’s eyes widened and she typed on her tablet before she rushed closer to her,</p><p>“You… you greeted me?” Abby sat in front of her, and she liked seeing Abby smiled,</p><p>“Yes,” she said again, softer this time.</p><p>“Oh my god! You talked! I knew it. I told them you needed more time to learn,” Abby pulled out her stethoscope and did the same thing every time she was there.</p><p>She waited until Abby finished, and tapped on her arm,</p><p>“What is it, 02?” there she goes again, calling her by number. She didn’t like it, so she grunted,</p><p>“Could you try to say it, sweetheart? I won’t be able to understand if you didn’t say it,” Abby said as she chuckled,</p><p>She frowned, trying to form the right sentence, but succeeded a few moments later,</p><p>“Don’t like,” she whispered, and Abby typed again,</p><p>“What is it that you don’t like,” Abby asked again,</p><p>“02. Don’t like,” she frowned again, she really didn’t like her name. It was different from Abby’s and Becca’s.</p><p>“You don’t like to be called 02?” Abby questioned her softly, and she shook her head no,</p><p>“Hmm…” Abby was silent for a while and she smiled at her,</p><p>“Alexandria,” Abby said to her.</p><p>
  <em>Was it her name now?</em>
</p><p>“What do you think?” the woman asked, still smiling.</p><p>She liked it, but it was too hard to say.</p><p>“A.. leksa…ndr,” it was hard and she huffed</p><p>Abby laughed, “That was too long, wasn’t it? How about ‘Lexa’?” Abby said</p><p>“Le..ksa, Lexa!” she tested the name again and liked it, it was easier</p><p>“You like it?” Abby said smiling as she typed on her tablet again,</p><p>She nodded as she tried to imitate Abby’s facial expression and Abby laughed again,</p><p>“Now that’s what I’ve been waiting to see. You have a nice smile,” Abby put away her tablet on the table.</p><p>Lexa did it again and Abby’s smiled widened. At the same time, Becca came in.</p><p>“Abby, how is she?” Becca asked and was about to sit down at another chair beside Abby,</p><p>“Hello there,” Lexa tried her luck again, and Becca’s eyes widened</p><p>“Oh my god! She talked!” Becca was half yelling and Abby chuckled.</p><p>“Becca, I told you she needed more time. And I just found out that she didn’t like to be called 02. Maybe that’s the problem. So I decided to give her a new name,” Abby looked at Lexa and the girl tilted her head,</p><p>“Could you introduce yourself, Lexa? Just like I did the first time we met?” Abby asked her, and Lexa nodded.</p><p>“I’m Lexa, it’s nice to meet you,” Lexa was proud she didn’t stutter,</p><p>“It was Alexandria, but it was a bit hard. So Lexa it is,” Abby explained and Becca smiled,</p><p>“It’s nice to meet you too, Lexa,” Becca took her hand and shook it,</p><p>“Not enough,” Lexa said, and she frowned again. She needed more words,</p><p>“Words, learn. New, not enough,” Lexa hoped that Abby and Becca could understand her,</p><p>“I think she needed more things to learn. All we taught her this whole month was basic things,” Abby said as she turned to Becca, Lexa interrupted them,</p><p>“Bored. More talk, please,” Lexa said again, and the two doctors nodded,</p><p>“Okay, we’ll move to higher level. Do you think she was ready for more human interaction?” Becca asked Abby,</p><p>“Do you want to come out and meet them?” Abby asked Lexa, as she pointed to the people in the lab coat.</p><p>Lexa hadn’t been outside of her room for three weeks. Lexa had everything she needed in her room. There were some physical training tools, which she used every day because Abby said she needed to train her muscles and Lexa like it, especially the treadmill.</p><p>“Okay,” Lexa said,</p><p> </p><p>Since that day, Lexa always learned new things. She learned their names and became friends with them.</p><p>Lexa was in her room, reading a book Abby brought her. The doctor would bring Lexa new books every day, and Lexa loved it. She told Lexa they were her daughter’s, and Lexa needed to take good care of it.</p><p>Sometimes, Abby would tell Lexa a story about her daughter; Clarke. Lexa loved listening to Abby talking about her.</p><p>And there was Jackson, Abby’s assistant. He was a nice man, and he knew Clarke, so Lexa would talk to him about Clarke. Lexa knew every single person in the lab, but Clarke was a mystery to her.</p><p>“Abby?” Lexa approached the doctor</p><p>“Yes, Lexa?” Abby turned around and stopped typing on her tablet,</p><p>“What was Clarke look like?” Lexa was curious, and she frowned when Abby stiffened for a moment,</p><p>“Do you want to meet her?” Abby asked</p><p>“Yes. You talked about her a lot, and I’m curious. I knew everyone here, and it started to get boring,” Lexa said with a frown and Abby laughed,</p><p>“I understand how you feel, Lexa. But you need to stay here, you can’t leave the facility,” Abby sighed and Lexa’s shoulder deflated,</p><p>“But-” Lexa wasn’t able to finish her sentence when alarm blared through the lab, and everyone started to panic. She saw Becca ran towards them with a backpack in her arms; Lexa’s backpack. Where she kept Clarke’s books and a few things Abby and Becca gave her,</p><p>“We need to go, Abby. The facility has been compromised. Let’s get out of here, Jackson!” Becca called the man and threw the backpack to him,</p><p>“Go with Abby, take the van through underground passage,” Becca commanded and Lexa was confused by all the chaos around her,</p><p>“Becca,” she grabbed the doctor’s arm and shook her head,</p><p>“Lexa, go with Abby and Jackson. I will be right behind you, okay?” Becca cupped Lexa’s face with both hands and looked into her eyes,</p><p>“You’re going to be okay. Abby and Jackson will protect you, my child,” Becca said softly, and for the first time, Lexa felt her chest ached.</p><p>“What happened? Why should I go? What about everyone else?” Lexa didn’t understand what was going on, if her home was in danger, Lexa has to help,</p><p>“We will be okay, Lexa. Now Go!” Becca pushed her into the elevator with Abby,</p><p>“Be safe, Becca. You know where to find us,” Abby said and Becca nodded. She looked like she wanted to say something, but stopped. The door closed and the last thing she saw was a bunch of people in black uniform stormed to the lab and as the elevator descended further into secret passage, Lexa jumped when she heard gunshot.</p><p>“Abby,” Lexa looked at the older woman, and Abby hugged her,</p><p>“Don’t worry, Lexa. Becca will be alright,” Abby reassured her, but Lexa didn’t like the ache in her chest.</p><p>A few minutes later, they arrived on the lowest level of the facility; Jackson was already waiting for them with a black van. They got in the car and Jackson drove them through the dark tunnel.</p><p>Lexa felt overwhelmed and it left her exhausted. She hadn’t been outside of the lab since the first time she woke up. It was her home, and it was taken away from her. For the first time, Lexa felt something stronger than the dislike she used to feel when people in the lab called her subject 02.</p><p>Lexa fell asleep not long after they exited the tunnel, and when she woke up, the first thing she saw were colors. Lexa knew her colors since Abby and the rest of the lab staffs taught her. But the real thing was much more interesting. She saw orange and blue and other colors,</p><p>“Beautiful, isn’t it?” Abby said from her right,</p><p>“Are we outside, Abby?” Lexa questioned and the doctor nodded,</p><p>“Yes, we are,” Abby smiled and Lexa hummed,</p><p>“Is it nighttime?” Lexa asked again.</p><p>“In a few hours, yes.” Abby answered as she searched her pocket. Abby was in a phone call with someone, but Lexa ignored it because she was fascinated by all things she saw. She decided she loved the trees; they were so green just like her eyes.</p><p>“We’ll arrived in two hours,” Jackson informed</p><p>“Are we being followed?” Abby asked cautiously,</p><p>“We’re clear. The tunnel exit was far from the facility. No one knew about it, and Becca made sure it wasn’t in the blueprint,” Jackson explained and Abby nodded.</p><p>“I destroyed all the files connected to us. No data about Lexa and the project,” Abby said and turned to look at her,</p><p>“You ready to meet Clarke?” Abby smiled and Lexa grinned and nodded, but she frowned,</p><p>“What about Becca?” Lexa felt that pain again,</p><p>“She will be okay, Lexa. She knew where to find us,” Abby said and Lexa nodded again,</p><p>“Okay,” Lexa was confused and sad, but decided not to dwell in it. She would meet Clarke soon, the mysterious person that made Lexa’s days for two months much more interesting when Abby told funny stories about her. She closed her eyes again, and let the void took over.</p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Clarke was reading in the living room with her dad. She loved Sundays since Jake didn’t have to work, and they spent their day together. Her mom, however, didn’t have the luxury of family days. As a doctor, Abby was always busy, even in the weekend. Clarke loved her mom despite the lack of her presence. When she was off duty, which was not often, Abby would give all her attention to Clarke, so she didn’t complaint.</p><p>She heard her Dad’s ringtone and he answered the call,</p><p>“Abby? What’s going on?” her dad got off the couch and walked to the kitchen. She heard muffled conversation, and then her dad was back in the living room,</p><p>“What is it, Dad?” Clarke asked,</p><p>“Your Mom said she was on her way home, and we have guests,” answered Jake with frown on his face,</p><p>“Okay…? that’s… cool, right?” Clarke was a little confused, but they dropped the subject and back to her book again.</p><p> </p><p>Two hours later, she heard the front door opened from her bedroom, and Clarke ran downstairs.</p><p>“Mom!” she ran to her mother, but stopped dead when her eyes connected with the curious green eyes. The girl was taller a few inches than her, her tan skin was a bit pale. Her hair was dark brown and tied in a ponytail.</p><p>Clarke was speechless. The girl was beautiful, and Clarke felt a pull towards her.</p><p>“Clarke, meet Lexa,” Abby cleared her throat, and Clarke blushed at the knowing smile her Mom gave her,</p><p>“Hi, Lexa. I’m Clarke,” the blonde stepped closer and held out her hand. She felt tingling sensation when her skin touched Lexa’s. She looked at the girl; she seemed a few years younger than her. And those curious green eyes widened,</p><p>“Hello, Clarke,” the girl, Lexa, greeted her, and Clarke was a goner.</p><p>“Lexa will be staying with us from now on,” Abby said, and Clarke had to force her hand to let Lexa’s go and faced her Mom, and noticed how worried she was,</p><p>“Is everything okay, Mom?” Clarke hugged her Mom,</p><p>“I need to tell you and your father something, let’s go to my office,” Abby patted her back before she pulled back.</p><p>“Jackson, you know where the guest rooms were. Please take Lexa upstairs,” Abby said and Jackson nodded. They walked to Abby’s office down the hallway. Clarke looked back at Lexa over her shoulder, and the girl looked like a lost puppy, before Jackson guide her upstairs.</p><p>//</p><p>“So, you were saying that you and Becca were involved in crazy experiment?” Clarke was shocked.</p><p>“I know what you were thinking, Clarke. It’s inhumane, crazy, but Becca did this for the good of humanity. Lexa was special and innocent. I had to protect her from those assholes. We woke her up two months ago, and she’s been learning in fast pace. She was so much stronger than average human,” Abby explained, but Clarke still couldn’t wrap her head around this new information.</p><p>“What did these people want with her, Abby?” Jake spoke up,</p><p>“I don’t know. Becca told me this project was confidential. Only a few people who fund the facility knew about it. Those people who stormed into the lab looked like they were from military. I’m afraid they wanted Lexa and the experiment’s data for military purpose. Lexa didn’t realize it yet, but she has high potentials,” Abby sat down on her chair,</p><p>“Then we must protect her. That girl looked like she lost everything,” Jake leaned on the desk,</p><p>“How old was she? Like, physically?” Clarke asked as she crossed her legs,</p><p>“18, but mentally, we weren’t sure yet. She learned faster when she was exposed to many stimulants. A month ago, she didn’t even know how to talk; now she could engage in simple conversation,”</p><p>“That was… interesting,” Clarke mumbled as her mind went back to those beautiful eyes.</p><p>They stayed in silence, and Jake cleared his throat,</p><p>“Are you sure it was safe for us to hide her here? I don’t want those people to be near our house, Abby,” Jake said seriously.</p><p>“I made sure to destroy every record about this project. Nothing would lead to us,” Abby said confidently,</p><p>“What are we gonna do about Lexa?” Clarke voiced her concern.</p><p>“She hadn’t been in the presence of someone her age. Maybe being around you would help her grow,” her mom said,</p><p>“Mom, are you telling me to babysit her?” Clarke groaned when her mom put a stern look,</p><p>“I have college to think about, mom. I’m 21 and I don’t want to babysit an adult,”</p><p>“Honey, I didn’t ask you to babysit her. You could teach her things that we couldn’t, to be human, to be the amazing woman, just like you,” Abby smiled and Clarke sighed. Her mom could be so persuasive sometimes.</p><p>“Ugh, fine!” Clarke relented, and had to suppress the smile that threatened to bloom.</p><p>Lexa intrigued her with those innocent eyes, but those gorgeous face and lean muscular body were just too hot.</p><p>The Griffins left the room after they discussed everything they need to do.</p><p>Clarke walked to her room upstairs and stopped in the hallway. The guest room’s door was ajar, and Clarke heard muffled sound from inside. She walked towards the door and saw Lexa mumbling to herself while digging into her backpack.</p><p>“Hey,” Clarke opened the door wider and leaned on the threshold,</p><p>“Hi, Clarke,” the brunette greeted shyly and Clarke chuckled,</p><p>“What are you looking for?” Clarke asked and the girl frowned,</p><p>“Clarke’s book,” Lexa answered and an adorable pout made its way on those plump lips,</p><p>“My books? Why were you looking for my books in your backpack?” Clarke asked in confusion,</p><p>“Abby,” Lexa said distractedly and emptied her backpack.</p><p>“Huh? What did it have to do with my mom?” Clarke wondered but her answer came when she saw her novels and some art books scattered on the floor.</p><p>So that’s where they were all this time.</p><p>Clarke always lost one book or two every week when her mom came home,</p><p>“My mom gave it to you?” Clarke asked as she walked inside,</p><p>“Yes. She said you love to read. I finished them all, you can have it back,” Lexa said, her voice was almost a whisper,</p><p>“You can keep it, Lexa. I’ve read them. I can lend you another book to read. Would you like that?” Clarke couldn’t stop a smile on her lips when Lexa’s eyes brightened,</p><p>“Really?” Lexa asked with awe in her eyes.</p><p>“Of course, Lexa,” the blonde chuckled when Lexa hastily picked her belongings up from the floor and put them on the desk in the corner of the room.</p><p>“Let’s go to my room. I’ll show you my collection and you can choose which book you want to read,” Clarke stood and her heart jumped when Lexa held her hand. As if Lexa could read her mind, the brunette explained shyly,</p><p>“Your house is big,” Lexa said and tightened her hold.</p><p>“Okay,” Clarke nodded dumbly. Lexa was used to be in a limited environment. The house was huge and she understood what Lexa meant; she didn’t want to get lost in the big house,</p><p> </p><p>//</p><p> </p><p>“Ugh! Lexa, could you please stop?” Clarke was having a hard time concentrating on her project. She needed to finish her paper and send it to her professor before midnight, but Lexa decided to roam around her room, just like she had been doing for a week now. Clarke wouldn’t be so distracted if Lexa was exploring her room quietly.</p><p>“Sorry, Clarke. I just…” Lexa stopped mid-sentence and she frown, looking like someone just stole her puppy. Her fingers fidgeted around the small camera she was holding. Her lips wobbled and she bit it to stop the nerves, and Clarke sighed as she regretted raising her voice at the girl.</p><p>It was her fault, really. After a week of just reading books and exploring the house, Lexa was bored and Clarke didn’t have a heart seeing those green eyes lost their curious glints, so she dug around her drawer and found her old digital camera her Dad bought for her tenth birthday.</p><p>Lexa was intrigued by the device, and so for a whole week, she would follow Jake or Abby around the house, snapping pictures of anything and everything she deemed worthy. When Clarke was back from school, Lexa would greeted her with the widest and brightest smile as she opened the door for Clarke, then snapped a picture of her before she could say no. Lexa stuck around her when she was home, and of course, taking pictures of her and everything until Clarke had to move the pictures to her computer; hundreds of them.</p><p> </p><p>Clarke sighed again and saved her works before she closed her laptop. Lexa stood still near the window where she was taking pictures earlier, and she looked so small despite her lean body. The blonde stood from her chair and walked closer to Lexa, who took a step back.</p><p>“Hey… I’m sorry,” Clarke said softly, noticing Lexa’s shoulder relaxed for a bit but still didn’t look at her,</p><p>“Do you hate me?” Lexa’s voice was so small and it broke her heart.</p><p>“No, Lexa, I don’t hate you. I was just tired and I need to finish my paper before midnight, and you were distracting me. I’m not mad at you, okay?” Clarke took the fidgeting hands in hers and Lexa finally looked at her, the greens shone with hope and Clarke couldn’t breathe.</p><p>“I’m sorry for yelling at you. Forgive me?” Clarke lifted her free hand and caress Lexa’s cheek and her heart fluttered when Lexa leaned into her touch,</p><p>“Okay, you’re forgiven,” Lexa whispered with a soft smile on her lips and Clarke had a hard time to tear her eyes away from them.</p><p>She cleared her throat as she took a step back and didn’t miss the crestfallen look on Lexa’s face when she stopped caressing her cheek. Clarke was intrigued by Lexa; sometimes she would act a bit childish, and then she would surprise Clarke, just like now. Lexa took a step forward and hugged her. Her arms were around her waist, her head on Clarke’s shoulder.</p><p>“Lex…?” Clarke’s breathe stuck in her throat when she felt Lexa kissed her exposed shoulder, wasn’t sure if she regretted wearing a tank top or …</p><p>Her train of thought was disrupted when Lexa pulled back and connected their foreheads, faces so close that Clarke felt the puffs of air from Lexa’s lips on hers. Her eyes closed as she exhaled shakily,</p><p>“Lexa…”</p><p>“Clarke,” Lexa’s voice was soft and Clarke opened her eyes just as Lexa closed the small distance between them with a tentative kiss, and Clarke swooned. She kissed back and Clarke was lost in everything Lexa; her scent, her taste, her sound. Lexa moaned, and Clarke wasn’t far behind, stranded in an unknown territory though it wasn’t her first time kissing a girl. But kissing Lexa was different but familiar in a way she couldn’t understand. She felt Lexa licked on her bottom lip, and suddenly Clarke’s head was swarmed with an image of a puppy licking her with how messy Lexa was. She giggled into the kiss and Lexa stopped abruptly. Clarke opened her eyes, still giggling and she felt bad but couldn’t stop. Lexa looked like she was about to cry or strangle her, then Clarke was laughing her heart out,</p><p>“Where- how did you… how did you learn that?” Clarke asked in between her laughter, and Lexa huffed cutely,</p><p>“You’re mean, Clarke.” Lexa was frowning and Clarke took a pity on her.</p><p>“I’m sorry, Lex,” Clarke said after her laughter stop, though she was still smiling widely.</p><p>Clarke took Lexa’s hand and pulled Lexa to the bed with her, sitting on the edge side by side,</p><p>“So… where did you learn that? That was a good kiss, except the licking part,” Clarke chuckled at the blush on Lexa’s face,</p><p>“This morning, I heard Abby and Jake talking in the kitchen…” Lexa recounted the event and Clarke couldn’t stop laughing at how innocent Lexa was, and the fluttering in her heart wouldn’t stop as long as Lexa was near her.</p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Lexa loved Clarke.</p><p>She loved the sound of her laughter and the way her eyes brightened every time Lexa was near. She loved the scent of Clarke’s shampoo and body wash, and would nuzzle her face in the blonde’s neck when they cuddled on Clarke’s bed or hers. She loved the way Clarke’s nose would scrunch when she was confused, or how her tongue poked out between her lips when she concentrated on something. She loved the way Clarke smiled at her every time their eyes met.</p><p>Lexa was in love with Clarke since the moment Abby talked about her six months ago, though she didn’t realize it before everything went wrong and Lexa hated Clarke’s screaming her name when people in black uniform stormed in to the house with guns and red smoke.</p><p>Four months of peace shattered just like that, when Lexa watch helplessly when they shot Jake on his chest where his heart was because he was protecting her and Clarke.</p><p>Lexa fought back, of course. But no matter how strong she was, Lexa wasn’t trained to hurt and kill, and she knew right then, she has no chance.</p><p>“Clarke! Run!” her ears was ringing and her stomach hurt. She looked down and saw blood oozed out of the bullet wound,</p><p>“Lexa! No!” Clarke was crying and Lexa hate it.</p><p>“Go,” Lexa felt her legs gave away and she was suddenly on the floor, still looking at Clarke as someone dragged her limp body, far away from the woman she loved.</p><p>“Clarke…” she whispered and her lips twitched when she saw Jackson pulled Clarke away while the intruders were busy containing her thrashing body. She would fight until she couldn’t anymore, until Clarke was safe. As she watched Clarke disappeared from the red smoke, her vision blurred and she knew she was crying, the thing she never knew she was capable of. In the six months of her existence, Lexa never cried though her chest ached, thinking about her home, and the figure close to a parent for her.</p><p>
  <em>May we meet again.</em>
</p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>“I created her to help humanity, not to destroy it. Try as you might, she wouldn’t obey your command,” Becca said calmly from her pristine white cell.</p><p>One year and four months after they held her captive, a year after she heard they’ve captured Lexa and Becca knew that they tried to reset her, to subdue her and trained her to be the most dangerous soldier but never succeeded.</p><p>“Oh, well. Let’s see how she reacted when you bled to death in front of her eyes,” the man in front of her said with a sneer.</p><p>And Becca prayed that Lexa would survive this as she was dragged from her cell into an isolated chamber, where they kept Lexa for a year. They made her watched how they tortured Lexa until she passed out, how they tried to break her and reshape her into a deadly soldier, but Lexa didn’t made it easy for them. But now, Becca wasn’t so sure anymore when she saw the once bright green eyes now dulled with so much pain and shame, her child was broken, and she sobbed.</p><p>“Oh my god, Lexa,” her heart wrenched at the cuts and bruises on the beautiful face,</p><p>“You sick bastard! How could you-” Becca didn’t get to finish her sentence as a knife pierced her abdomen and she fell on the ground, eyes trained on Lexa who was chained to the wall. Her ears were ringing as she tried to reach her child, who was thrashing around, her eyes alight with fury and anger, and Becca was afraid this would finally break Lexa,</p><p>“Please…” she struggled to keep her eyes opened, but the consciousness left her stranded in a void,</p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>She was a monster, she realized.</p><p>She tried really hard not to give in to her anger and pain and hatred. They took her away from Clarke then tortured her over and over again. She lost count after three months of agony. They taunted her, mocked her, degraded her, but Lexa clung onto the memories of her short-lived happy life with Clarke, Abby and Jake. She clung onto the words Clarke kept repeating every night; that she was human, and she deserved to be loved and to love.</p><p>But today it was the last straw and she snapped seeing Becca, her maker, her parent, the source of her birth, lay on the floor with blood all around her. There was only Becca in front of her, she knew that, but her exhausted soul saw her whole family. She saw Jake, bled to death. She saw Clarke, shot in her head. She saw Abby, her throat slit and blood gurgled from her mouth. She saw them reaching out for help, and she was helpless.</p><p>Lexa broke free from the chain, numb with anger and hatred for the people who did it to her. Her logic was shut off; her tired heart succumbed to the pain. All that left of her was her demon, thirsty for revenge.</p><p>When she emerged from the facility in the middle of nowhere, the dying Becca in her arms, Lexa was back. Her anger was satisfied and simmered down. She survived, but it felt like she died inside of the now on fire building. She killed hundreds of them; the guards, scientists, everyone who tried to stop her became victim to her vengeful demon.</p><p>Looking around, there were only gigantic trees around her and Becca reached for her cheek, her hand was cold.</p><p>“I’m so sorry, my child,” Becca choked on her blood,</p><p>“No! no! please, no!” Lexa lowered their bodies on the ground and cradled Becca in her arms,</p><p>“Look at me, Lexa,” Becca smiled when their eyes met,</p><p>“You’re so brave and strong, I’m proud of you,” she said softly, her breath came short,</p><p>“I’m a monster, Mother,” Lexa choked out.</p><p>“No, you’re not. You did what you had to do to survive. That’s what being human entailed, among many things, of course. You will find the rest of it,” Becca’s voice was barely a whisper and the she was gone.</p><p>Lexa screamed in agony.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>“Sweetheart, it’s time to go,” Abby called from downstairs, but Clarke ignored it. She was sitting on the bed where the last time Lexa wrapped her strong arms around her all night. Three years, and not a single day she didn’t regret keeping her feelings for Lexa.</p><p>Clarke loved Lexa, she had been since the day the beautiful brunette came into her life. The innocent smile and her bright, intelligent green eyes always gave a fresh breathe into her days.</p><p>Clarke waited, for three years, hoping that Lexa would come back. But with her Dad’s gone, her mom couldn’t live in the big house anymore. Just like Abby Clarke was haunted by Lexa’s face every single day, but she clung to a hope that Lexa might come back to them. But if they move out, Lexa would never know where to find her, and it tore her soul.</p><p>“I miss you,” she broke down, again, as she clutched the old digital camera that only consisted of Clarke, blues sky and books, and Clarke’s room, or Clarke’s blonde hair. There was no single picture of Lexa, and Clarke cried harder at her lost love.</p><p>“Clarke? Clarke!” her mom’s voice snapped her out of her misery, the urgent tone raised an alarm in her head. She rushed out of the room and ran downstairs, but stopped in the middle of living room where there stood a beautiful woman with the greenest eyes.</p><p>“Lex…?” she choked out, too shocked to move her legs.</p><p>“Hello Clarke,” her voice has matured but Clarke knew it was her. It was Lexa, her Lexa.</p><p>Lexa walked cautiously towards her, and Clarke sobbed into her chest when Lexa hugged her tightly,</p><p>“It’s you. You’re back. Oh god! You’re back,” Clarke was now crying and laughing, as she nuzzled into Lexa’s neck, inhaling her scent.</p><p>“I’m here, Clarke,” Lexa whispered and kissed her temple,</p><p>“I miss you,” Clarke pulled back, just enough to see those eyes she adored so much,</p><p>“I love you,” Lexa said, smiling,</p><p>“I love you too,” Clarke leaned up and kissed Lexa, who then licked her lips, just like their first kiss all those years ago,</p><p>“Oh god! Stop licking me, Lex!” Clarke giggled and Lexa connected their forehead, just like how they always did,</p><p>“I miss you, so fucking much,” Lexa said and they laughed, though the tears didn’t stop, they were happy.</p><p> </p><p>//</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Dear wifey,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I think we both know how bad I am with words, though I love reading and writing them, but to actually say it to you scared the shit out of me. So I decided to write this for you.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>We’ve been through a lot,</em>
</p><p>
  <em> For the total of five years we were together, you put up with me and my demon. You guided me through the nightmare of losing you all over again, though I knew you were safe, but the fear was just so strong. And the last two years were - are the happiest moments of my existence.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Thank you, for accepting my messed up proposal two years ago.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Thank you, for reminding me that life is more than just surviving, that I, though born from an underground science laboratory, deserved better than that.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Becca said that to be human is to survive at all cost, but you teach me every single day, that to be human was more than that. To be human is to love, and be loved. Being human is to strive with your strength and accept your weakness. Being human means that you will face your demon head on and tamed it, and you help me through it all.</em>
</p><p>
  <em> I strived with you by my side; you are my strength, and I accepted that I am weak to your beautiful smile, your bright blue eyes and your voice, oh god, your voice was my own personal drug and I love it, I love you, Clarke Griffin-Woods.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Yours,</em>
</p><p>
  <em> Alexandria Griffin-Woods</em>
</p><p>
  <em>P.s.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Backyard, now ;)</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Clarke laughed at Lexa’s attempt being the romantic one in their relationship, which they both knew that the brunette would ruin in a matter of second. But Clarke loved how cute Lexa was for trying hard to show her how much she loved her wife. Their first anniversary was a beautiful disaster and Clarke couldn’t wait to see what Lexa would do this time,</p><p>“Please tell me Raven wasn’t involved in this,” Clarke shook her head as she walked to the door that led to their backyard, only to be met with another disaster that made her laughing her ass off,</p><p>“Raven! I told you not to blow it too much! Now it was all over me,” Lexa was covered in a mix of chocolate and icing,</p><p>“Why did you want to put up balloons all over the cake, you dumbass? And why did you put a dozen of candles on the cake when you were only celebrating your second anniversary?” Raven yelled back in frustration, also covered in the mess they made.</p><p>“Oh god! You guys really need to stop hanging around each other prior to our anniversary,” Clarke laughed and shrieked when something hit her hair. There were chunks of cake covered in chocolate and icings,</p><p>“How dare you!” she gasped and Lexa smirked,</p><p>“Happy Anniversary, babe,” Lexa’s smug face morphed into wide grin and then a terrified one when Clarke gathered the now ruined cake in her hands and jumped at her, bringing them both down, both women covered in cake from head to toes.</p><p>“You’re lucky I love you, my silly wife,” Clarke kissed her wife’s messy face then her lips, tasting their anniversary cake on them,</p><p>“At least you got the cake right, it’s delicious,” Clarke hummed in appreciation and Lexa chuckled beneath her,</p><p>“Lucky me,” Lexa gazed up at her, green eyes shone with so much love,</p><p>“I love you, wifey,” Lexa winked and cursed when some icings slipped into her eyes,</p><p> </p><p>“Oh shit! Fuck! I’m dying! I can’t see! Clarke!” Lexa screamed in terror while Clarke doubled over,</p><p>“Raven!” Clarke gasped when her bestfriend dumped a bucket of water on her wife’s head, effectively washing down the mess on her face, but they laughed when Lexa spluttered and cursed,</p><p>“Fuck you, Rae!” Lexa huffed and puffed, Clarke hugged her and kissed her once again,</p><p>“I missed my innocent Lexa sometimes,” Clarke chuckled and Lexa rolled her eyes,</p><p>“Blame Raven,” Lexa said nonchalantly, and kissed her back,</p><p>“Hey! You should thank me, asshole!”</p><p>The tree of them laughed at each other messy appearance, and the tensed up when a certain voice rang through the house,</p><p>“Children! What did you do this time?!”</p><p>They scurried to get rid of the mess but Abby found them and scolded them like teenagers, but all in all, despite the mess and the lecturing from Abby, which seemed like weekly occurrence now, they were happy and in love.</p>
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